The paradox of male support

“The law is written to be non-sexist and blind, but that’s not always the case,” said Mosberg, speaking on his own behalf. “More and mor...


“The law is written to be non-sexist and blind, but that’s not always the case,” said Mosberg, speaking on his own behalf. “More and more women are in prestigious positions and more husbands are staying at home with the children, but men who receive support are still the exception rather than the rule. ”

Judges often scrutinize men more harshly when applying for support, reflecting the bias that assumes men are, or should be, breadwinners, said Brendan Hammer, a Chicago-based lawyer. “Judges can also ask for a logbook, to prove that the husband is trying to earn what he once did, or even a living wage,” he said.

Elizabeth Lindsey, president of the American Association of Matrimonial Lawyers, said in her experience that judges often give men less support for shorter terms while expecting them to return to the workforce for longer. faster than women.

“There is a growing trend to move away from long-term alimony,” she said, noting that in Georgia, where she currently practices law, courts can still award life-long alimony. . “Overall, spousal support is about rehabilitating and retooling the spouse who earns less or is unemployed,” Lindsey added.

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Men who have landed in a situation of dependency say they have found themselves there for various reasons.

When Glenn Smith married in 2014, he became the step-parent to two teenage boys. His wife, a tax lawyer, was the couple’s top earner and he quickly gave up his career as an insurance salesperson to look after boys, he said. The relationship fell apart in 2020, and the divorce was finalized in early 2021. He receives $ 2,000 in monthly spousal support, something that will continue for two and a half years.

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