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P.A. System at Trump Rally Accidentally Blasts Woodward Tapes


MINDEN, NEVADA (The Borowitz Report)—Questions arose after the P.A. system at a Trump rally in Nevada accidentally blasted excerpts from Bob Woodward’s interviews with the President.

As supporters streamed into the rally, the customary sounds of such classic rock songs as “Fortunate Son” and “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” were supplanted by audio of Trump acknowledging that the coronavirus was far deadlier than a flu.

After Trump was heard revealing the details of a previously secret weapons program, campaign aides frantically disconnected the P.A. system and started scrambling for an explanation.

“We have no idea how this happened,” one aide said. “Jared was in charge of the playlist.”

Unlike artists like John Fogerty and the Rolling Stones, Woodward said that he wholeheartedly endorsed the Trump campaign’s use of his recordings at its rallies.

“If the people at these rallies watch Fox News, this might be the only way they hear these tapes,” Woodward said.

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